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I'm twenty years old today. Woop! :la:
  • Mood: Happy
  • Listening to: Don't You Worry Child - Swedish House Mafia
  • Reading: Textbooks
  • Watching: The news
  • Playing: The Sims 3
  • Eating: Birthday cake
  • Drinking: Water
Greetings, the vertically challenged Loon is here to bombard you with one of my (usually) beloved text walls and sarcasm.

But first...


I'm back at college, and most of you probably remember (or have heard of) my "Roommate From Hell" saga that dominated the forum for a few months last year and resulted in my getting a guaranteed single dorm for the rest of my time at college.

Well, good news for me, I'm still living alone in a single door. The only thing I share is a bathroom with three other girls and a common area with one of them.

Karma came out in my favor: the series of complaints I made was used as evidence against her and the whole thing went down on her file. That means that it will show up every time she applies for a job or another university, so everyone knows what a raging bitch she was! :la:

Her shitty best friend wasn't listed in the whole event (even though she should have been), but karma got her, too. The other day I went to pick up a tuna sandwich for dinner (love me some tuna) from one of the dining halls and I discovered shitty best friend working there.

Shitty best friend has to serve me sandwiches.

Life is good for the Loon.

Now for the actual complaining!


I get back to college and learn that the wifi, previously only limited to the common rooms of my dorm building, was expanded to reach the rooms! There's a big router on my wall! I don't need to bring back my own shitty router! Hot damn! :la:

Of course, like everything else in my life, there's a catch.

The provided wifi is INCONSISTENT. If there's one thing that sends me into a psychotic rage, it's inconsistent wifi. :stare:

The wifi itself is good. The download speeds are fast, it can quickly load youtube videos and cat pictures, and it lets me argue with strangers at the speed of sound.

But goddamnit, these random slowdowns need to stop.

I was sitting on Facebook, mocking my cousins as I normally do (they're so damn stupid :crying:), and BOOM, internet cuts out.

Five minutes later, it's back on. I got back to mocking.

BOOM! It's out again, then back. Repeat about fifty times and I'm twitching.

I almost miss my near-dialup speed router from last year; it may have sucked, but at least it was reliable. :stare:



Last year, my advisor told me that I was more advanced at English than most other students my age and got me special permission to be in the more advanced classes early. Awesome! :la:

This year is also going to be great, because all but one of my classes is English (the other one is Women's Studies, that's a complaint for another day) and I dominate in English. My advisor told me it was a good idea to clear as many major-related classes as I could early because it would make my GPA skyrocket and I'd be able to goof off when senioritis hits later down the line. Oh, and all of my classes are later in the day, so I can sleep in!

So, yesterday afternoon, I load up my backpack and go to my first class, The English Renaissance, a normally senior-level class dealing with writings from the 1500s and 1600s. The professor gets into the syllabus and everything sounds peachy; lots of reading, only three papers.

But then she says the words that will always sends a chill down my spine: group project.

Fuck. :stare:

Then, she says "presentation."

Fuck. :stare:

Then, I realize to my absolute horror, she put the words together.

"Group presentation." :fear:

I'm fucked. Someone come hit me with their car.

:icontealdeerplz::iconsaysplz:GROUP PRESENTATION. HELP.


This one actually isn't that bad. I met all of my suitmates and they're all very nice. One also had a roommate from hell last year, and the other is very quiet and keeps to herself.

The other one...well, I don't know much about her, because she barely speaks English. All I know is that she's from China, she's quiet, and she has good taste in shampoo.

I want to be able to get to know her because she seems very, very nice. When she moved in she knocked on my door and asked me which side of the sink I wanted to keep my stuff on and if was okay if she could use my paper towels (though it took about five minutes of broken English combined with miming to figure out what we were trying to say to each other).

I grew up around a lot of foreigners, so I'm not too bad at getting through language barriers, but it's so awkward to mime everything to someone who you barely know. It makes me feel impolite because I don't know her language.



+ I hate the word "mandatory." It automatically makes me want to do the opposite of what it tells me to do. No, RA, because you used the word "mandatory," I don't want to go to the floor meeting. "Required" is a much nicer, less harsh word. Use that instead.

+ Daytime television (Dr. Phil, Maury, stuff like that). It's like a trainwreck; I shouldn't be watching it, but I just can't look away (speaking about trainwrecks, how about the whole Josh Duggar thing?).

+ The first day back and the elevator up the massive hill I live on breaks. I either had to go all the way around to the real path up, or I could hop up the rocks that looked a bit like steps and shave fifteen minutes off the walk. I climbed up the rocks. I felt cool but my back hates me for it.

+ The water pressure in the shower sucks. People can pee with more force than that.

+ It's syllabus week, so I'm bored out of my skull in class. I want to get to learning!


+ My birthday is on the 8th! I'm going to be twenty! :la:

+ I build an entire shelving unit out of milk crates and duct tape to put in my common area. I'm very proud of myself for it.

+ Peppermint tea = perfect way to start and end my day.

+ My suitmates are all very nice, despite the language barrier with one of them.

+ I've started learning American Sign Language because with my anxiety, I pretty much can't physically talk when I'm nervous, but I can still sign (I learned the sign "PANIC" a while ago and would sign it when I was about to freak out and couldn't speak). So, I decided I would learn it so that I'd be able to communicate when I'm nervous. Right now I'm just practicing the more "fun" things like insults (I can sign "eat shit and die" and "smoke weed everyday"), but I'm also learning more practical things, too. I'm actually pretty good at it! :la:

Good afternoon friends! Today, I bring you tales of woe that involve the evils of technology, an angry mob of hungry felines, soccer moms in large groups, and other stories.

1. Whoever invented the trackpad should be shot!

I work as a full time babysitter for a special needs child. He's five years old and loves video games. I'm nineteen years old and love video games. Sometimes when I watch him, we play games together. On these days, I bring my laptop to work with me and set it up next to his computer, and we'll sit and play our respective games together. He plays Minecraft, and I'll either play Morrowind or SimCity 2000.

Today was one of those days where we were supposed to play games together, but alas, it couldn't work out. Why?

Because I accidentally left my fucking USB mouse at home. :stare:

"No problem!" I say to myself as I set my computer up, "I'll just use the trackpad!"

Of course, that was my chipper part-time mom exterior that I put on for the kid so he doesn't know I'm actually dead inside. On the inside I was screaming every swear word known to man and several known only to dogs.

Trackpads and I have a disagreement with each other. When I was in eighth grade, I took a nasty fall down an asphalt path during gym class and ripped most of the skin off of my left hand and almost all of it off my right hand. Now, six year later, the skin is all back, but I have permanent nerve damage in much of my right hand, mostly on my right index finger. Basically, it doesn't work right anymore and is pretty much useless except for telling the weather. Everything that you use your index finger for, I use my middle finger. I point with my middle finger (which has gotten me into some awkward situations more than once), I type with my middle finger, it's pretty much both my index and middle finger nowadays.

Trackpads are difficult for me to use with my middle finger. It's hard, everything goes wrong, I click on things that I don't want to, nothing gets highlighted, and it's just easier to use a USB mouse. I try with my left hand since I'm ambidextrous and can use both hands equally, but I'm so out of practice with a track pad that it's just pathetic to watch.

Video games with a trackpad? Pretty much impossible.

And all I had today was a trackpad.

I just played Plague Inc. on my phone instead.


2. The kid is not my son!

More adventures with the special needs five-year-old I babysit (who shall henceforth be referred to as the Kiddo)! This time, it was Wednesday afternoon, and I decided to take him to the park for a little while. The Kiddo agreed. We put on some sunscreen, wandered over to the park, and the Kiddo had a blast running all over the place. Being an old lady trapped in the body of a nineteen-year-old, I had a difficult time keeping up with him and just sat on a bench watching.

The park we went to was three-tiered on a hill. On top of the hill was a playground for older kids, a large swingset, and a basketball court. The second tier was a bunch of pavilions and the restroom. The third and bottom tier was a playground for much younger kids. This is where the horde of soccer moms had staked their claim with their large amount of small children.

The Kiddo had to go to the bathroom, so we went down to the second tier and used the restroom there. We come out of the restroom, get a drink at the water fountain, and then the Kiddo sees all of the other little kids on the first tier. He's off like a shot to go see what they're up to. I follow behind him and stay off to the side of the moms, since soccer moms and I usually don't get along.

Eventually, the moms notice that the Kiddo is running around playing with their kids. They look at him, judging him; the Kiddo has autism and acts "weird" compared to other children, but once you figure him out he's just like any other kid. He has his own "language" and own way of holding a conversation, which I have figured out and use to communicate with him. I also use a bastardized form of sign language with him if he can't figure out how to use his words or understand me.

Snapping my fingers at my side means "come here".

Snapping my fingers in the direction of a spot on the ground means "go there".

Pointing my left ring index finger at him and shaking it means "no" or "stop that".

There's a ton more than that, but that's just a general idea of the sign language we developed for each other.

I get his attention by calling his name, and then making the appropriate gesture for the situation. If I want him to come over to me, I shout "Kiddo!" and snap my fingers at my side. It's my go-to to get him out of certain situations, like if he's bothering someone (though sometimes he doesn't always come).

I do this a few times while he's playing when he starts getting too rough with the other kids. The moms look at me every time.

Eventually, the other children gather around the moms. Kiddo follows and is still having a blast with the other kids. I follow close behind and am now standing with the moms instead of off to the side.

He and the other children make their way back onto the play equipment, Kiddo betraying me and leaving me to fend for myself against the horde of judgmental soccer moms. I remain silent while they sit there and talk about throw up and diapers, thinking "I'm never having children of my own."

Eventually, one of them looks at me, and asks "When did you have your son?"


This always happens when Kiddo and I go out together. No matter where we go or what we do, every time, without fail, someone asks me when I had him or if he's my son.

Naturally, my Loon Sass kicks in in these situations. At first I used to politely explain that I'm just the babysitter, but after this happening so much and realizing just how nosy people are, I quit and just go right to the sarcasm. I find that it makes people leave me alone more quickly.

This situation is no different. I default to sarcasm.

"Oh, he's not my kid. I just found him one day and decided to keep him."

Cue horrified looks. Kiddo overheard me and starts to cackle (I've taught him well). I then explain that I'm the babysitter and that they shouldn't assume that every young-looking woman with a child in tow is a teenage mother, and even if they're a teen mom you shouldn't judge because they have enough problems going on.

:icontealdeerplz::iconsaysplz:Everyone assumes that the kid I babysit is my son and that I'm an unwed teenage mother, and treat me accordingly. HE IS NOT MY SON GODAMNIT! :iconstareshakeplz:

3. Empty food bowls and angry cats.

I have four cats, and, like all cats, if I don't feed them EXACTLY at their usual feeding time, they act like they're going to starve to death and gang up on the nearest person.

Yesterday evening, I fed them at five o'clock as usual, but the bag of food was empty after that. My mom said (claimed, actually) that she was going to go to the store after my brother's fencing lesson that evening, so I gave her my usual list of stuff to get (plus cat food) and told her we were completely out of cat food.

Mom did not go to the store after my brother's lesson.

I woke up this morning, and there was no cat food. Only a three hungry cats sitting around the empty bin and Misty howling upstairs.

Uh oh. :stare:

The three other cats all gang up on me. There's nothing I can do and I have to get ready for work, so I go make myself some tea. Dad is already halfway out the door to go to his job and promises the cats that he'll bring home a bag of cat food by noon. Brother is still passed out upstairs in his room. Mom's laptop isn't working and is on the phone with her office's tech support since my dad and I are going to work and can't help her (I got good at fixing computers during my absence). The cats have no one to gang up on but me.

My adversaries include, from oldest to youngest:

Misty, fatass tortieshell, deaf old lady, skills include meowing loudly and laying on things you're using.

Kitty, fat tuxedo, angry old man, skills include knocking things over for attention and scratching things that shouldn't be scratch.

Cookie, fatass silver tabby, princess, skills include licking things too much and sitting on things you're using.

Guinness, tiny black cat, idiot, skills include mournful meows and pathetic looks.

Misty is upstairs in my brother's room, howling (my brother sleeps through this because he's actually a rock). Guinness is sitting at my feet looking up at me with his big baby eyes. Cookie is on her hind legs with her front paws on my leg, meowing. Kitty is jumping onto the counter and getting in between me and my tea.

I go upstairs to shower. Kitty, Cookie, and Guinness sit outside the bathroom door howling and scratching.

I go back downstairs and check my various social media. Kitty sits behind me yowling. Guinness paws at my legs. Cookie pushes my laptop lid shut repeatedly.

After a half hour of kitty cat onslaught, I'm going crazy. My babies are hungry and there's nothing I can do!

Then I remember that we have cold cuts in the fridge...

Long story short, after getting mobbed by angry, hungry cats, I remedied the situation by grabbing some cold turkey out of the fridge and feeding that to the cats. That got them to leave me alone long enough to get out the door to work, thus making them my mom's problem.

:icontealdeerplz::iconsaysplz:Mom forgot to buy cat food. Chaos ensues and is only fixed by cold cuts.

4. Misc. Complaints

+ I took my driver's test and failed. Then my learner's permit expired and I had to do impressive gymnastic feats to get through the hoops to get a new permit.

+ I go back to college in less than a month and have to be an adult again.

+ My family keeps forgetting that I don't have a sense of smell. I haven't had a sense of smell since I was five. I'm almost twenty. Really, people? :stare:

Because I, the vertically-challenged cat lady, have nothing better to do than complain about my life, here's how my summer is going so far!

1. Curse you muscle memory!

Back in March, my external hard drive failed and took $300 dollars worth of video games with it. I managed to rescue Skyrim, but everything else was lost; Spore, Arena through Oblivion (I own all of the Elder Scrolls games, suck it), SimCity, everything.

Today, I've managed to restore Skyrim back to the former glory I had it at, SimCity is working once more, and I reinstalled Morrowind earlier last week. I don't have enough memory left on my main hard drive to fit the rest of my games, so they have to wait until I can either get a new, proper computer instead of the Frankentop, as I have come to call my current one or figure out how to split my Steam and Origin installations between two hard drives (yes, I use Origin, don't judge me). The new computer is more likely since mine is a piece of shit MacBook Air with Windows installed and USB objects out the wazoo.

Everything is fine and dandy in my little world of video games...

...well, sort of.

You see, my two favorite games to play as of right now are The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim and The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind. Both are great games in their own right and Morrowind has so far aged decently (the graphics look like thousand-year-old potatoes, though, since it came out in 2002). The only problem I'm encountering?

Muscle memory.

Morrowind and Skyrim have different controls. To get an idea of my struggle, here is an example of a few of the controls:


- SPACEBAR for activating

- “E” for jumping

- “Right click” for opening your inventory

- TAB for changing from first to third person

- "Left click" to attack


- "E" for activating

- SPACEBAR for jumping

- TAB for opening your inventory

- "F" or scrolling to change from first to third person

- "Right click" for left-handed attack

When I first started playing Morrowind in earnest, I kept accidentally trying to use Skyrim's controls. I would have attempted to transfer Skyrim's controls to Morrowind, but because of the fundamental differences between the two games it would have been a nightmare. In Skyrim, you can dual-wield weapons and magic, but can't use magic if you're holding a weapon. In Morrowind, you can't dual-wield, but you can hold a weapon and use magic at the same time. Skyrim also has a WALK - JOG - SPRINT system, while Morrowind only has a WALK - SPRINT system (unless you have mods to increase the starting WALK speed like I do, because I want to play Morrowind, not Snailwind). So yeah, a nightmare to transfer controls. Add in the fact that I play on a bootcamped Mac and don't have as many keys as an actual PC, and it's just...ugh.

Luckily I found an old USB PC keyboard from 1997 in my basement, which will work with my computer once I get the keyboard itself working. All I need is some canned air to get the grime out from under the keys and a few dozen bottles of disinfectant because a lot can happen in that basement between 1997 and 2015. Bugs. Dust. Jimmy Hoffa. Who knows what else is down there? I don't. :stare:

But anyway, back to my griping about muscle memory.

After a few hours of playing Morrowind and screaming because of the cliff racers (which will haunt me until the end of days), I finally get the hang of the controls. Everything is going swimmingly (except for the cliff racers) and I'm running around happily shanking bandits in the face and bribing people into liking me (a system that should be brought back for The Elder Scrolls VI).

A few mornings ago, after checking on my oldest cat from this complaint, I decide to play Skyrim instead of Morrowind for a little while. I've sunk close to 2000 hours on Skyrim (1000 on Xbox 360, almost 1000 on PC), so the control changeover should be easy, right?


Curse you, muscle memory! I didn't want to stab that guard when I tried to open my inventory! Now I can never go back to Markarth! :crying:

Wait, no, that's a good thing. Fuck Markarth.

:icontealdeerplz::iconsaysplz:I tried to open my inventory and now a man is dead.

Anti-complaint: Misty is all better! :la:

All better! by Crazylittleloon

All better! by Crazylittleloon
All better!
Misty was sick over the weekend but she's better now!

Journal History


Grace Erickson
Artist | Student | Literature
United States
So I finally got around to putting my actual first name on here. I've gone by my pseudonym for a while on here because I'm a paranoid fuck, but...well, I've gotten a bit better about that, ha.

I'm nineteen and three quarters, extremely neurotic, and a writer. I seem like an egotistical jackass but I'm actually not, I just pretend to be so I feel better about myself. I enjoy doing stupid shit for other's amusement, video games, and playing with my babies (cats, in case you were wondering).

I'm in my second year of studying for a degree in Creative Writing and will probably go into editing, but my dream job is to be a stand-up comedian. I'm also thinking about minoring in IT because I spend a lot of time screaming at technology.

I've been writing Elder Scrolls fanfiction as of late, because I don't have the time to commit to something of my own at this time. I also want to save any ideas I get for NaNoWriMo, which I have won five years in a row.

I'm extremely skilled at knitting and crochet, which I do a lot in my free time. I make very cute baby hats and can churn a bunch out in one day as long as I don't have any cuts on my fingers. But I just recently moved to the land of snow and crack-houses (aka Northern Pennsylvania) and accidentally left all of my supplies behind. Sob.

I also draw on occasion, but I'm not all that good at it. I'm actually terrible at it. I mostly do it to get a feel for what my characters look like or if I'm stuck in a boring class.

I speak fluent English and German, enough Russian to not get shot, and am learning Finnish.

I'm obsessed with the Elder Scrolls series and the Eurovision Song Contest. I own all five games from The Elder Scrolls, mostly playing Skyrim and Morrowind. Skyrim is my favorite since it was the one I started with and the graphics don't look like potatoes (well, kind of...I play on a bootcamped Mac so the graphics are actually terrible).

As for the Eurovision Song Contest...well, lets just say that I skipped my senior prom to watch it instead and I got so worked up over Denmark winning in 2013 that I actually fell out of my chair. I can sense people talking about Eurovision from up to six miles away in good weather conditions.

I make mods for Skyrim in my free time. Hit me up if you want links to download locations.
I'm twenty years old today. Woop! :la:
  • Mood: Happy
  • Listening to: Don't You Worry Child - Swedish House Mafia
  • Reading: Textbooks
  • Watching: The news
  • Playing: The Sims 3
  • Eating: Birthday cake
  • Drinking: Water


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Add a Comment:
pinkandpurple13 Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
HAPPY BIRTHDAYYYYY!!!!!!!! :happy birthday: Lily Wishing a Happy Birthday Hide Birthday Emote 
Crazylittleloon Featured By Owner Sep 15, 2015  Student Writer
pinkandpurple13 Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
YUP :3
megstiel Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2015  Student General Artist
this is going to sound weird but i was browsing reddit and found you.... i remember you from complaints but it was weird 
Crazylittleloon Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2015  Student Writer
I'm all over the internet, dear. No worries.
megstiel Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2015  Student General Artist
it was just a weird happenstance i guess! i didnt expect to see ur username there 
MorbidiaDrekk Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2015
How is my little Loon? Feeling better, I hope.
Crazylittleloon Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2015  Student Writer
Much better! But these dietary changes are going to kick my ass.
DementedInk Featured By Owner Oct 25, 2014
THANKS so much for the fave.
Crazylittleloon Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2014  Student Writer
No problem.
megstiel Featured By Owner Oct 7, 2014  Student General Artist
youve had the same icon for like 4 years or something now 
Crazylittleloon Featured By Owner Oct 7, 2014  Student Writer
megstiel Featured By Owner Oct 7, 2014  Student General Artist
its a belarus cosplay right 
Crazylittleloon Featured By Owner Oct 8, 2014  Student Writer
MorbidiaDrekk Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2014
Merry Birthmasween!!! :cake::hooray::party::dance:
Crazylittleloon Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2014  Student Writer
Thanks. :la:
Sapphire-Ashesx Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2014
Happy birthday! :la:
Crazylittleloon Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2014  Student Writer
Thank you! :la:
Sapphire-Ashesx Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2014
You're welcome. :) How was it?
Crazylittleloon Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2014  Student Writer
(1 Reply)
Gameshopplz Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2014
Crazylittleloon Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2014  Student Writer
SpaniardWithKnives Featured By Owner Sep 2, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
You are a funny one :la::la:
Crazylittleloon Featured By Owner Sep 2, 2014  Student Writer
Marquite Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much for the faves and the watch! :hug:
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